With the open window by her side, with nothingness depicted on the dull walls of the opposite block, this doesn't necessarily come from her heart.
A conversation over the phone that lasted for at least an hour or so.. With an emotional outburst that took place inside her, she is reminded of what she spoke and most importantly what she was told:
Caller: Do you or not love me?
She: Uhm.... Well I Like you now.
Caller(almost about to yell): What are you saying? Do you even realize what you are trying to do over here?
She: I know. I dont think its working anymore?
Caller: Why? What happened? Am I doing anything to you? Have I shown any less love to you?
She (Trying to explain herself): NO. You don't understand. Its not you. Its this place, I m not able to cope up and give you that kind of time.
Caller: So whose mistake is this? Why din't you think of all these things when you first got along with me? Now do you realize how much you are hurting me? You were someone who has impacted me so much, someone I go on painting the town about telling that you are that someone, I respect you so much and this is what I get in the end?
She: I hadn't anticipated all this.. I cant envision a future here :(
Caller: Do you realize how immature you are sounding right now?
She (sobs): Yes, maybe I m .. But can we just go our ways before anything else goes wrong? Why is it that I have to explain myself so much?
I m unable to handle it and that's the end of it.
Caller: So are you dumping me?
She: Don't get into this new age vocab and make it look like any other affair. Its not easy for me. Try to understand.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Yes! The kind of fights that she has been having over a period of time. Over relationships, over not showing love, over being busy and above all not being committed. This time she is clearly haunted. Unable to see through this hazy picture that she painted ahead of her. What went through her mind she was quite clear about, but was not capable enough to deliver and clarify.
What bound her with him was this inseparable feeling called love..That which was in those conversations during nights, that which was unspoken of when with people and in public's eye, that which wanted a physical intimate reverie, with aspirations to grow old together, and stand for each other.
So what went wrong?
She separated. She got a new lease in her life, with new people around her in a far flung land away from the humanity, and she was carried away....certainly she was. No she din't find a new person in her life. She just got carried away. Now she had brand new goals, and brand new priorities, with a brand new agenda to just live her life in an utmost important way. Make her presence felt and feel important. With this new hope and this new dream, she wanted to step ahead, leaving all that had taken place in the past.
But is past always past?
It keeps punctuating the moments that have made a difference altogether to one's life. When spoken of leaving that piece of history where it's meant to be, nothing but resent was shown.
Hasn't she a choice of herself? Abound to the person she loved once upon a time, when it comes to her situation why isn't she understood? Why is she always disturbed?
She is confused! She is loved! She is bound to these cruel societal norms.
She doesn't deserve you. You are deserved by someone who will be equally committed. If you understand what she is going through, she will be more than satisfied.
She will linger eventually with time and will live with the best moments that she had with you...
Give her a chance and you might find out that she is right on her part.
A conversation over the phone that lasted for at least an hour or so.. With an emotional outburst that took place inside her, she is reminded of what she spoke and most importantly what she was told:
Caller: Do you or not love me?
She: Uhm.... Well I Like you now.
Caller(almost about to yell): What are you saying? Do you even realize what you are trying to do over here?
She: I know. I dont think its working anymore?
Caller: Why? What happened? Am I doing anything to you? Have I shown any less love to you?
She (Trying to explain herself): NO. You don't understand. Its not you. Its this place, I m not able to cope up and give you that kind of time.
Caller: So whose mistake is this? Why din't you think of all these things when you first got along with me? Now do you realize how much you are hurting me? You were someone who has impacted me so much, someone I go on painting the town about telling that you are that someone, I respect you so much and this is what I get in the end?
She: I hadn't anticipated all this.. I cant envision a future here :(
Caller: Do you realize how immature you are sounding right now?
She (sobs): Yes, maybe I m .. But can we just go our ways before anything else goes wrong? Why is it that I have to explain myself so much?
I m unable to handle it and that's the end of it.
Caller: So are you dumping me?
She: Don't get into this new age vocab and make it look like any other affair. Its not easy for me. Try to understand.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Yes! The kind of fights that she has been having over a period of time. Over relationships, over not showing love, over being busy and above all not being committed. This time she is clearly haunted. Unable to see through this hazy picture that she painted ahead of her. What went through her mind she was quite clear about, but was not capable enough to deliver and clarify.
What bound her with him was this inseparable feeling called love..That which was in those conversations during nights, that which was unspoken of when with people and in public's eye, that which wanted a physical intimate reverie, with aspirations to grow old together, and stand for each other.
So what went wrong?
She separated. She got a new lease in her life, with new people around her in a far flung land away from the humanity, and she was carried away....certainly she was. No she din't find a new person in her life. She just got carried away. Now she had brand new goals, and brand new priorities, with a brand new agenda to just live her life in an utmost important way. Make her presence felt and feel important. With this new hope and this new dream, she wanted to step ahead, leaving all that had taken place in the past.
But is past always past?
It keeps punctuating the moments that have made a difference altogether to one's life. When spoken of leaving that piece of history where it's meant to be, nothing but resent was shown.
Hasn't she a choice of herself? Abound to the person she loved once upon a time, when it comes to her situation why isn't she understood? Why is she always disturbed?
She is confused! She is loved! She is bound to these cruel societal norms.
She doesn't deserve you. You are deserved by someone who will be equally committed. If you understand what she is going through, she will be more than satisfied.
She will linger eventually with time and will live with the best moments that she had with you...
Give her a chance and you might find out that she is right on her part.
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