Monday, April 8, 2013

Beginnings and everything that comes along...

On flipping through the wedding/bride special femina magazine in my dazed state, i happened to figure out how will or should it be for me?
It doesn't need to be big, fancy with five thousand people pouring over just to hog over food and give fake blessings.
It mustn't be too small an affair to not even make a flutter in the so-called 'society'.
What it should or must be a good day, packed with anxious moments, surprises, happy and not tense moments because I'm the girl.
How should it kick-start?
the boy must must must be tall. He cannot be my height. I'm not asking for good looks, I'm demanding good substance in your head and heart. Likes, dislikes must find some middle ground. And you or your folks alone don't get the right to choose me alone. Me, Aayi and papa also get a say.
if there's a possibility, i don't want to just get a ring on my finger, and show it off around, telling the world, I'm taken.
Lets get to know each other. Lets become friends, enjoy each other's company. Because this company will last till death do us apart, remember?
With lifestyle, living patterns, interests changing almost on an hourly basis, lets adapt to one another. Take a friendly trip, go dining, drinks, theater or films.
Lets hold hands in public and start displaying a little affection. You see, we're getting comfortable now, i really hope you get me. I don't have issues, but i cannot trust you entirely too. You have to sweep me off my feet, make me feel loved in some proportion to live together forever.
I don't say as a soon-to-be better half you wouldn't expect things! Humanity survives on expectations:)
that's why i stress on communication. Because lack of it will be disastrous and i say this out of personal experience.
When you see a mutual spark, you're allowed to kiss me (surprise me!) Lets seal it there. You and I go home, again communicate the decision to our folks respectively and fix on a ring exchanging day. Lets not get into the hassles of the 'muhurtham', I feel we deciding with the help of a local priest should just do the job. The day can be any of the seven of the week, but why not to have it on a day we first met? Lets try to signify the days, the occasions, and therefore the moments!
I don't like crowd much, what i like is a genuine crowd. So let it be a small group having people who have been so important to us in the form of family, cousins, colleagues and friends. The best part about having them around is that they will be happy with us in our happiness. And mutual happiness means lots of almost positively charged vibes. Oh! And look we just got engaged darling! (I suppose we're at the liberty to call names, but lets not make it look like puppy love, I'm not used to it)

If spoken in proper Hindu culture, if we're engaged, we're half married. We don't get the license to boss around still, ok? The actual work begins now. I have come to believe that I'm pretty much capable of living by myself and party on my own terms. This means i need to have my own space. I'm quite tech savvy too. Smartphones have brought the world closer shrinking it further. It's not a bad thing. But i need you to not call/text/Whatsapp all the time. Lets fix on a particular time everyday. Lets meet every week. If you or I happen to leave the town, lets be there to receive at the station or airport. Little things matter. These will contribute to the big picture.
Instead of getting a tag of being engaged, lets know each other more. Lets avoid anger or rage of any sort. Understanding is the key.
It's going to be like a fun ride, only if we want it to be the primary element. You're allowed to advise me when I'm stuck, and i hope i get the same rights too, because i will keep referring to those pre-engagement days which we spent to know about each other. Let there be a rule of sorts. Agree to disagree, disagree to agree and vice versa accordingly. Will too many rules spoil the fun? Don't know! We'll figure it out.
all this looks really time consuming. It does to me as well. But I'm hoping it will all be worth it. I want less of bickering and yelling. I don't want to argue for the rest of my life and find each other sett the house on fire in the fit of rage. Why? Because we didn't work on the foundation of this togetherness.
I'm looking for a happy ending to pave way for a beautiful beginning. Nothing less nothing more. Lets talk, and lets do this. It's got to be worth it.
(To be continued)

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